Not just between your legs, But also between your ears….
Sex. It’s a touchy subject in the neck of the woods I grew up in. Throughout my childhood and adolescence sex was not a topic that was discussed very often (well at least with one of my parents, who will remain nameless). Sex was almost a taboo in my household as a child. I wasn’t allowed to listen to music with sexual undertones (hence the hiding of my Alanis Morrissette cassette tapes!). I felt very awkward watching any movies with any type of sex or kissing in it, mostly with one of my parents (the one who shall remain nameless - although if you know me, it’s not so anonymous, haha). I even felt uncomfortable watching the little mermaid kiss Prince Eric. Yup. And of course, growing up in a very conservative Christian environment led to more awkwardness about sex. This may explain my fascination with all things related to male/female interaction. So you can thank my upbringing for “It’s Up to Us!”
As a result of a recent presentation I did in a grad school class about what happens in the brain during sex, I felt compelled to share this information with all of you out there because I thought it was fascinating.
So here we go. I apologize in advance if this is still a “touchy” subject for you, but I have a feeling this won’t be the last article about sex. =]
What becomes activated during sex?
The most important parts of the brain that are actively involved during sex are located in the Limbic System (Diagram here!).
The Limbic system houses parts of the brain like the amydgala (associated with fear/anxiety), hippocampus (memory), and the hypothalamus. The hypothalamus is a big important one. It is involved with releasing the sex hormones. And when the levels of the sex hormones fall, so does sexual desire. Another MAJOR part of the brain and sex is something called the nucleus accumbens. This is the brain’s “pleasure center.” I found it very interesting that this center is also associated with addictions such as nicotine and caffeine. Sex activates that same pleasurable feeling that cigarettes and coffee give to some. Wanna quit smoking? Start sexin’ it up! :)
Orgasm is Good For you!
Yes, it is.
I can’t reiterate it any other way, it is simply good for you and the research is out there to support it. When a person orgasm’s, the brain shoots out a major dose of dopamine which is a neurochemical that activates the reward circuit and makes us oh so happy! To calm the dopamine down and grant sexual satisfaction, the hormone oxytocin (see prior blog post) is then released into the blood stream. The oxytocin counter-affects the dopamine and as I’ve talked about in past posts can initiate a bond between partners, depending on the circumstances.
Important thing for females (and males to note) about female orgasm:
Women have to be relaxed and unstressed to achieve it. If a woman is not completely anxious-free, it won’t happen. However, this does not apply to men (figures). Research indicates that in order for a woman to get where she needs to be, the amygdala (fear/anxiety part of the brain) needs to be deactivated. Fancy that!
So women, relax away and let it happen. You don’t need a man for it either :)
One last little tid bit...
Did you know that…
Men have on average ten to one hundred times more testosterone than women?
So basically, women have testosterone, or else they wouldn’t be able to do it at all. But men have TESTOSTERONE. So we really can’t blame them for thinking about it all the time. Sorry ladies.
The sex-related centers in the male brain are actually about two times larger than the same structures in the female brain.
No joke – this was a new one for me. Size does matter (!) - When it comes to the male brain, that is! The brain areas that women have dedicated to sex are smaller than they are for men, and this can start developing in boys 8 weeks after conception! So I would like to apologize to the men in my life for getting mad at them for thinking and talking about sex all the time.
I can’t argue with biology.
Ta ta, for now friends! I’d like to hear your thoughts, or if you have any suggestions for future posts let me know!
2 comments:
First off Mel, you don’t have to apologize for talk about a topic that is actually very important to human life. I don’t like that parents, religion, media, and socialization have robbed men of their manhood and women of womanhood. Want to hear some more fun facts about sex? Women who come into direct contact with sperm are happier than women that don’t. Women whose husbands/lovers don’t use condoms are happier women. Women retain 50% percent more sperm when they orgasm; which dramatically improves pregnancy chances. Sex releases endorphins which are great for headaches, so stop using a “headache” as a way to avoid sex. Sperm has proteins in it that are great for skin.
Look, sex is simply an important part of life. Sigmund Freud said people are after 2 things in life: survival and replication. This means that Freud placed sex as 50% of the reason for our existence. Maslow placed sex on the same level as food and water on his “hierarchy or needs”. It is shameful that people have made sex a shameful subject, even though it is a great way to make an emotional connection with someone. The stronger that emotional connection gets, the stronger the orgasms get for a girl. Women experience much of life through their emotions; which is why a girl will stay with the wrong guy for long periods of time. Girls will even let their lives be destroyed by a guy just to keep the emotional arousal alive.
There was a famous movie called “a street car named desire” about a guy that beats his wife, gets drunk every night, and rapes his wife’s sister. Women were coming out the theater saying how horrible the movie was and terrible the guy was, but studies show that women were actually fainting in the theater and were extremely aroused. The main actor even became a sex symbol, and dated the hottest chicks. The movie was more entertaining than some of lady’s boring relationships. Wrong, women are sexual creatures and they think about sex equal too if not more than men. The idea that men think about sex more is a falsehood. Women get more out of sex than men ever will. My Secret Garden is an amazing book about female fantasy, girls want it in so many different and wild fashions; it blew my mind. I think if more men knew who to arouse their women rather than leave her bored with “only” love-making; maybe we would have less infidelity and cheating.
I tell guys all the time: give a girl an orgasm and she will always come back. It is okay to like sex, but it doesn’t mean you have to be a slut. I think sex is an education every man and women must learn so both parties are satisfied. Women say, "I want him to make love to me", but like I say; what women want is not what they respond too. Complacency, routine, and boringness are killers of relationships…..
Okay first of all thank you for your contribution as always :)
I think it is sad also that sex is a taboo or it is not emphasized as much in society. The less people talk about it the more mystery there is - especially with adolescents and young adults. And uneducated sexual activity leads down a very dangerous path....
I knew those fact except the one about women coming into direct contact with sperm haha very interesting! I bet a lot
Of guys could use that to their advantage ha.
I've seen streetcar just never knew that story behind it haha I definitely gotta do some research on that! Wow. Lol
Okay I totally agree we think about sex alot more than we fess up to. But I don't know when I
Compare how I think about sex to how my guy friends think about it (at least how they express it) I feel like we are from different planets ha ha. Mars Venus eh eh?
Jk but in all seriousness I haven't found Many guys who think
About sex the way I do. And in the past the guys who did think the same way as me I wasn't attracted to. Figures.
Maybe women just want a rough "manly" guy who can also love them and be sensitive to their needs once in awhile. Haha that's a total oxymoron.
Post a Comment