And Women Are Apparently Like Waves....

Part two. John Gray, author of “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” says:

“A woman is like a wave. When she feels loved her self-esteem rises and falls in a wave motion. When she is feeling really good, she will reach a peak, but then suddenly her mood may change and her wave crashes down.”

In short, a woman’s ability to give love to her partner is relative to the amount of self-esteem she has. A woman’s ability to give and receive love in her relationship is generally a reflection of how she is feeling about herself. Okay Mr. Gray, if you explain women this way, no wonder guys want to run the hell away!

I will admit, this is true to an extent. Self-esteem plays a big part in how well a woman can function in a relationship. Based on the social expectations we (women) have to live up to, can you blame some of us for having self-esteem issues? Most women are very emotional individuals and this is manifested in different ways - not necessarily by crying, moodiness, neediness or withdrawal.  But that is not ALL WE ARE. We also need emotional and physical space in relationships. We may be somewhat like waves, but many of us are also rubber bands.

We need space just as much as men do, however it’s not something we always give ourselves. I can attest to the fact that I’ve been in relationships where I am super excited and want to spend every moment with that person and I ignore the fact that I really need some time away – but when I finally take that time it’s like a breath of fresh air. To be honest, I think it may help a woman to realize she is not just an emotional being but a person who needs autonomy and individual time for herself.

I posted a quote on the It's Up To Us! Facebook site a week ago:

“Men argue for the right to be free while women argue for the right to be upset. Men want space while women want understanding.”

I would like to rephrase this:

“Men argue for the right to be free while women argue for the right to be upset AND free. Men want space while women want and need understanding AND space.”

Woman are dynamic beings and we aren’t one-dimensional so you can’t put us in a box. So call me a wave, a rubber band, a piece of meat, a “bitch,” or sugar and spice and everything nice. Who knows – I may be ALL of that and a bag of chips. 

And Women Are Apparently Like Waves....