Let's Talk...About Talking: Men, Women and Words

Alright ladies, girls, women – admit it, we love to talk and we know it. Based on my conversations with male friends and significant others in the past, I hypothesized that for every 100 words a female speaks, a male speaks 10. Then I did some research.  I found an article that estimates that women talk three times more than men do (Read More). The article proposes that women speak “up to 20,000 words in a day - 13,000 more than the average man.” Holy moley! The article adds, and this gave me a chuckle, “Women also speak more quickly, devote more brainpower to chit-chat - and actually get a buzz out of hearing their own voices.” Ba ha! I believe it. 


Buzz buzz buzz.

I’ve come across some men in my lifetime who could definitely talk it up. But as a generalization (I do a lot of generalizing on this blog don’t I?) women tend to use more words than men. In my experience as a woman and with my female counterparts, we use talking to benefit our well-being. It is a form of therapy, an expression of emotion, a way to “vent” and so much more. There are so many times in my life where I’ve been down in the dumps, called one of my close friends, laughed about some inside jokes and my mood was immediately lifted! That’s also probably because I have an addiction to collecting inside jokes. ;)  

Talking is also a way of nurturing our minds without the need for coming up with a “solution” or a “fix” to the problem.  A quote from an article in Psychology today highlights the difference between men and women and the use of talking: “To a woman, the conveying of the "story" is as important as the story itself, but most men don't care about the details! They want to get to the bottom of things.” (See full article)

In my opinion, females are also experts at non-verbal communication - words are only a fraction of what we are truly communicating. Our voices, eye contact, facial expressions, gestures, and body language tell how we feel or what we are thinking, sometimes more than words can possibly express. Unfortunately, non-verbal communication can be even more powerful than words and can be used in manipulative ways, which enters dangerous territory. And remember, just because women have this acute ability to non-verbally communicate it doesn’t mean that all of men’s non-verbal cues should be analyzed, because half the time (or possibly more than that)   THEY MEAN NOTHING. 

Alright, so we get it…….we talk too much ok? I’m sorry I can’t help it, I am a woman and I have all these words in my head I need to get OUT! 

While doing research on the “talking imbalance” between men and women, I came across some other very interesting research and came up with a conclusion: Men may not talk as much as women, but what they lack in words they make up for with thoughts about sex. 

Yup, I said it.

 Per research from the Kinsey institute at Indiana University, “54% of men think about sex at least every day, 43% think about it a few times a week or month, and 4% once a month or less.” In contrast, “19% of women think about sex everyday or several times a day, 67% a few times per month or a few times per week, and 14% less than once a month” 19% versus 54% - although its not as drastic as some have estimated (“Men think of sex every 7 seconds FALSE), it is apparent that men think about it a lot more than women do.

So can I propose a compromise? We’ll (I speak for women of America) accept that fact that you (men of America) think about sex all the dang time if you will just let us talk and/or ramble on about things you may not necessarily care too much about every now and then. I propose a little swap of understanding, that’s all I’m sayin! 

I’ll end this post with three thoughts of the day to ponder:

·  Men and women THINK differently

·  Men and women SPEAK differently

·  Men and women DECIDE differently

And….that’s a wrap. Thanks again for reading my little blog friends!

 Here's a funny comic to end the day with....

 

Let's Talk...About Talking: Men, Women and Words